Study and Da'waa
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.
Assalamualaikum wbth...
The last week is totally a heart-broke week ever along I'm here. Yes! Last week, I did enjoy to participate in PBL Biology Session where my my team requires to discuss about a man, that finally diagnosed to have hypoxemia and plus, have a history on pneumonia. Of course, for a moment, the picture of a group of physicians is discussing a bout their patients. Hahaha.... (berangan jadi doktor sebentar yang tak mungkin seindah yang disangka).
Then, after finishing my very first PBL Sessions, some of my friends did asked me to terjah lecturer's room to get our chemistry test marks. I did have instinct that my my marks surely gone bad. I did read and revise but just don't no why i don't feel the zouq when studying. (masalah hati ???)
Then, the lecturer welcomed the four of us including me to get in his office. He asked us to sit first as he was already discussed something with two other my classmates. Just bumped in (exactly eavesdrop) their fornal chit chat - lecturer and students (got it?)
Out of blue, the topic on having usrah while studying aroused.
OH. wait. What?????
There is no need to go details for that conversation. Just heed the main point on that topic. On all the conversation, i could see that (oh... baru aku tahu!) Indeed, there are some people that marked a bad sign on having usrah. They said....
*mane lagi penting study ke usrah? study tu fardhu ain kan? usrah tu fardhu kifayah?*
for me, we don't have to be biased on usrah as we are the one who did 'mengfardhu kifayahkannya'
All the satans' whispers did flow over my head as I did enjoy the usrah and getting involved in an Islamic Board here. And plus, my result gone bad as what i did feel earlier... All the dirty thought were dancing over my head such as should i do get involve in this da'waa path as my result just get worse? was having usrah is the key point for my failure? (Arghh.... mula bergoyah semangat yang dibina untuk Islam! Sungguh aku manusia yang lemah)
Then, my evening gone bad as i keep thinking of it. I just need somebody to motivate me again.
After finishing my biology lab session, I wait in front of masjid. Try to call abah. When the times to say out all the things that really burden my heart, I got speechless and Abah try say again "Kakak, abah tak dengar nih, dekat feri.... and blabla'
Me : test kimia, result teruk. al least perlu dapatkan 80. and i just score 60 someting. Padahal soalan tu tak patut dpt markah camtu. masa nak tau result, kena jumpa lecturer dlu. pada hemat abah, abah rasa tak pa ka kakak masok jpmu dan join usrah. Abh rasa kak terlibat benda ni semua, kak memang akan jatuh ke? bagi pendapat abah macam mana?
*Rintihan seorang anak yang hilang mental coordination temporarily *
New Message appeared on my Motorola's screen.
Abah : Alhamdulillah. Pelajar-anak yang hebat, keputusan itu mengiringi pembelajaran kita. sabar dengan gandakan usaha berganda, pasrah berdoa dengan Allah, dan bertawakkal dengan Allah, InshaAllah, pasti Allah mendengar dan selesaikan hajat,hasrat dan munajat kakak. Jdikan kak, anak abah yang jiwanya besar. Hatinya kental dengan semangat waja, punyai tekad juang dengan jihad hadapi pelajaran kerana Allah. Mudah2an semangat dari abah menjana kuat semangat dan iman.
The tears burst! Speechless. Have to profound it again till reach the heart. Sungguh!
Another New Message appeared.
Abah : Kalau gerakan luar penyebabnya kakak fikirkan , boleh lepasakan jawatan. Kalau bukan kerana itu, teruskan. Abah sentiasa, terus menyokong setiap tindakan dan keputusan Kakak. K
I did sleep in the evening as i could feel all my carotid artery and all of the blood vessels in my head did expands and even the Panadol couldn't aid at all. But, at the same time, did thinking what the best solutions in this really head-aching problems.
After that.... I sent a message to Abah.
Me : Ok! Jazakallahu khairan kathira abah. Ya... kak kena berjiwa besar. Doakan kak tabah dan terus ada semangat juang macam abah!
New Message again.
Abah : Alhamdulillah, Kakak dah sempurnakan keputusan terbaik lagi hebat untuk perkukuh iman minda kental. Kakak, Subhanallah. Almarhum Us Fadzil, Al Us Yahya Othman, TG Nik Aziz, TG HJ Hadi, Dr. Haron Din, Dr Aziz Hanafi adalah pimpinan utama Azhar, zaman mereka. Tetapi anak2 mereka ramai yang jd Dr., IR, pesyarah, penguam ,hakim. Jejaklah mereka anakku. .............
the message got longer. Expected. Abah juga seorang penulis. Yang masih lagi setia dengan sistem Zaba. Yang kadang-kadang berkerut-kerut dahiku untuk memahami bait-bait kata yang sangatlah banyak jurang perbezaan antara anak 1994 dengan anak 1954.
Ya. Dunia jelmaan jahiliyyah zaman kini perlu kembali tautan hati dengan tauhid pada Dia! InsyaAllah! Letakkanlah aku di barisan pemuda-pemudi Islam yang teguh untuk menegakkan agamaNya. Semoga diizinkan Allah kata-kata seiring dengan kota!
p/s : study and da'waa... together!
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